Required Value and Input: The Muscle You Build From Taking The Stairwell. An Essay, A Creative Writing, A Speech and A Love Letter All In One.

December 23, 2019


In a book written by Devon Franklin, an author I was introduced while deciding to read "The Wait" by him and Meagan Good there is a statement about "how will you know you are winning?". This resonated with me deeply. Mostly because in mediated society people can see into lives, events and stores that they will never or would have never had access to if they did not roam into a place due to watching a commercial. There are people who have seen people win awards or do astonishing things and are aiming to do those exact things in a way where they do not notice that in order to "know" what they are aiming to "know" in the immediate moment it would be like playing a game of monopoly and knowing how much money the other players have in their hand. That is also showcasing lack of skill development or knowledge that the "game' can be played again to identify a new winner. There is also something worth noting about people who know that there is a difference between a win and a championship. I will say that some people give up their real life mentors, teachers and groups because they make them the opposition or aim to copy, connect or be like someone they have seen on television. There are people who will also feel like they are making gains when they notice someone who has walked up the staircase experiencing shortness of breath, tiredness and the things that occur while building muscle mass and endurance that they do not experience because they have not done the proper workout for what they are seeking to output. I also learn in action and make decisions for myself that make sense for my life. I will experience the wear and tear of learning about corrupt business practices which means I will travel a further distance to get an item and wine in my head that the item is also more expensive. I may be seen by people who should actually be on a stairwell while I am doing this who then fail to receive a gift or lesson from me about lavender products from the Paper Store and how this is the better decision to make for overall health, wellness and a better life experience at the moment. I also have noticed that there are people who attack people who are interested in something they are doing or learning because of the results of people who are seeking monetary gain or have been forced in some capacity to have the perfect result. You can see the big difference in the things they output into society. I am also not prone to participating in frivolous argument. There are people who are on task and others may feel disturbed by their task. If you come to me to address a task I am doing because of what is apart of the description of what you saw me doing at a specified time frame, if I create the pathway to fight you to the death I would not understand why there is a shock or surprise. I do not know why you would be addressing me especially if I have done nothing wrong. Essentially you are coming to address a person who is being appropriate in an inappropriate manner and expecting no response or a scared one. Do notice, why there would be nothing coming out of my mouth. Also notice if there are adult family members who place children in the family together who then become exposed to other groups of people and choose to veer off, other children and adults may invite their being into an "unsupervised" space and feel in power or become aggressive because they are not able to see that the person who they are "making fun of" or whatever they are attempting to do is in the middle of family arranged playtime. Notice when a population of unwelcome people make believe that they are of some importance because they are in the middle of looking at a child develop in a sandbox where all the children apart of their family structure are gathered. I have had to be taught more than once to take away the privilege of being the protector for people I would know to protect even when they have not come to realize that I am the person who is their relative that is going to automatically fight for them in the particular structure we are in. They have to learn when there will be no one then to protect them because the older members of the familial group have seen them choose in another direction. It will not be my fault if you have removed me from your play space that I will still be in while I am sleeping and notice when I wake up that I have the oil that would or could have been shared and provided to and for those who have been grouped with me. I have to learn because of the expense to literally cut people off even if they have to or will still be in the area. Better is better. There are people who have watched televised structures and made believe that they have formed a congregation or created proper and stable relationships. People also have seen people interact several times and do not realize that it only takes one time to be able to give an assessment about what someone is or how well they do it. There are people turning one into several. I often have to be backed down by people who are aware that people are selecting their own self for something that others are supposed to identify them for. They will often target the perimeter or area to see why I am presenting or doing a certain thing that they feel they are supposed to be doing and do not realize that the selection process has occurred and they are not suitable for what they are aiming to do at that time, often when they should be and should run the opposite direction before speaking to the person they would never want to notice this. They often are wanting to look fancy in a commercial or pose in a magazine and do not realize that in this instance they would need to be able to fly a spaceship. I am also often targeted like a person who will make fun of people or exclude people when I do not. Had you walked up several flights of steps, several times you would be noticing the same thing or having a response indicative of several flights of steps. That is how major components of people's identities or platforms get overlooked. In a group of people I do not make myself responsible for diagnosing someone or not allowing them to be in the space equally. There are people who are diagnosed with things who have tricks to cause the equivalent to occur to people who would not even notice how they are impacted. I know for a fact that I once participated in a dance party and there was someone who people may call disabled or mentally ill. All I saw was a person dancing and proceeded to dance and have fun myself. Anyone who did not continue to do what they would do normally or naturally actually will, would have or still are experiencing their version of that person's condition or worse. There are people who would be published authors who essentially sat out of using a computer lab because the appearance of someone who was on one of them. Please let me state here that there is nothing funnier than being a person who has been discussed in your absence or highlighted for something positively who then happens to be participating in a group activity where people are looking for something of a stereotype or showing in public what they see is problematic and wanting the person to be made fun of for it. Not realizing the "amazing person" is being a group member and the task is to run on the treadmill and you keep pointing out you see the person sweating while walking to the ladies room. I have learned to continue what I am doing and know to read and enjoy the writings of people like Devon Franklin even when their are people I have come into contact with who I would want to see publish similar text who ultimately have sat out of their space for some reason unbeknownst to me. I actually benefit from knowing that I am American in these moments or feelings of absence of others who should to some degree be experiencing rough drafts with me. I will say that media makes people behave as if they have sat or been allowed into preliminary sessions. It also may cause people to think that they are on a golf course being a caddie and not realize that they could get some brownie points in the location they are in if they take the trash out or hand someone soap for their shower. I often am "abused" even if I do not realize it by people who do not know how to be "in" the crowd even if they stand out or others select them or acknowledge them as the best. I also do not stop the work or effort because of someone or something being better or in the spotlight at the moment. It is like knowing how to work at a strip club and not using your knowledge of a main character that you have seen on a screen cause you to cut across or into someone else's territory, role or space. Also paying attention to when it is this behavior that is causing attention to someone that you could have destroyed at something in the immediate moment because of the fact that they will be on their way to the grocery store while practicing minimalism and have no intentions of having on heels in the moment. This makes perfect sense. There are some people who put discussion where their individual alterations in the immediate moment should occur. For instance there may be a person "taller" than you who can see over a fence and you really might need to run around and grab enough bricks or boxes to stand on so you can also see what YOU would like to see as well. Then the other accommodations and discussions can be made to address the overall scenario and what is needed or required. There are people who do no notice when they are asking questions in public and private and become angered like a person who would act out if a person does not give them the answer in the middle of a test where there is clearly no speaking and a larger consequence than one might be aware of. There are people who would want to "call me out" when I allow someone in a position or title who may not "do work" according to others walk by me and alert me of "no talking" and then everyone watch me prepare an entire doctrine that they could present at some other venue even if I am not acknowledged. This to me is the obvious thing to do when you "know your role" and are in alignment with the overall purpose. I have realized that in my familial structure their are people who cannot tell when offspring have removed them from a space that provides all their life value and raise their children in this way. However, the children live in the crossfire. Their may be grandmothers who live like a grandchild should "roll over" so they can live in the house with them in a mothers location and a "child" consistently be redirected to the point that a person begins to see everything they will lose aiming to separate completely from a particular familial structure. Some people also cannot see that people are using them and will allow problems to arise and occur and they will feel supported when they are not. The result that they want to occur is what is being supported. There is someone who wants me to stop doing my work in what is "free time" or while a particular person is "at work" or overall in charge and fail to see that anyone who does this is seen to have abandoned post in their homes, employment and community even if they think they have not. They often watch other people collect or speak and do not engage with the literature or material. As in the day I learn someone has drunk alcohol or something and really would tell them about a red solo cup if I see them. It is also giving people information about when they are backing out on being "Black" because they are "Dominican" and do not realize that the group they may be supporting may be undocumented and also separate their culture in terms of "Black" and "White" as well. "I already know this" is a a true statement. I cannot always tell when someone is "seated" because they do not see that they are "successful" among an immigrant community who find it hard to get work because of this status. One's who are also grouping this person as "Black" even if they are in the same ethnic group or category of some sort. Also, understand that if you are affiliated and in several ways there are things people will block you from. Often when making commentary about something someone does not like or did not do they may use a negative word that can them impact other people and give off the wrong impression. These words may just leave someones lips prematurely or because they have seen a televised script and think it is okay to speak or they place people in their subconscious mind on a set and participate with them even if they are something like the person about to "rob" them.  As they do this they may help and do things to highlight the person that would support and help them before, during and after. They may also seek to give apology where they would not be able to get a word out because they have attributed "kind" and well-meaning to "adult" or a "title". I suggest, if you went through the school system, organized activity, or learned something from the people in your life that you do not act as if "you have nothing to do and cannot think of anything". Grab a journal, see if you can use the onions in the fridge to make a meal or even take a nature walk. Maybe show some strength of a person who actually wants to help, volunteer and get better and not "pretend to shy away" to end up being the person that was better and gets selected in front of everyone. There are people smiling knowing that people want me to have this behavior and I really am sitting and doing my work peacefully. It throws them off that if for some reason I am entered in the "wet t-shirt contest" I go to do my best and if I win I am still going to see if I can partner with a local organization to get books to children to increase literacy. #TheSatire #TheIntersection #TheOnePersonWhoCanOilMeUpOrDownForSomethingLikeThat #LetMeWhisperInYourEar #WhatDoWeWantGlitter #WhenDoWeWantItNow


I have learned on the "stairwell" that the issue people have with me and many people like me is that they all of a sudden want to be "Black" together or "American" together after they have fought this off and people like me are already at levels of success and collaboration that they have already went to weaken. This is positive in the sentiment that it betters partnership and collaboration because I can without remorse understand supporting someone's fashion line when "starving" people are in my face. Especially when they have already been offered active participation by people who would typically cut them off. There is a lesson that I have learned as to why I should continue learning. This is when people cannot tell the difference between independent and dependent. I use the analogy often of a person who is a "child" on their parents vacation versus someone on their own actual vacation. Some people are taking up ownership over someone else's organized activity that they happen to be included in and would be included in if their name was Zoomkisha. The people who establish identity when "they just happen to be there" but not in a way that showcases that they have actually done something. For instance in my world travels I know what to focus on and I know what to let others focus on when I am their guest. There is no confusion for me in this area. I will always put my game face on knowing that I "washed" a dish and cut my finger when it is culturally inappropriate to have a guest wash a dish but I have the best cuddle face ever to interrupt whatever disruption my behavior causes and also know what to do if I cut my finger, even when doctors are all around us. #FirstAidKit. I have also learned to tell people to actually really, really ignore people whose comments are coming from where they cannot see themselves or have no "mirror" so to speak. As in you have something "funny" on "your face" statements when they do not know that they have eyelids or that they are pointing out your eyeballs and not noticing they have them to. I have spoke about my censorship and having three strands of it that can be found in the title of a piece of poetry. It is funny to me to show people how I am a "team player", even if that means going for the big win! #KeepYourHeadInTheGame #MusicalChairs #AllBlackEverythingWhenItComesToYouBooBoo


I would suggest listening to soothing rain water at night to help sleep better. I once had a person I know, not sure the title she speaks of me, give me this as a part of my overall recipe for self-care, emotional-care and overcoming trauma. There is something funny about the thought process or teachings that come from people who did not shower daily or have products. They think something that is often not so in present day. It would be actually pretty bad if someone thinks I have germs from two years ago on me. Some of that is psychological and just a way to develop a sensational conversation. I also encourage a mediated generation, to make an adjustment that I am also shifting in myself. It is the one when you are highlighting or loving on someone in a way that shows you did not see the "assassination" part or reason why in your textbook. Many are telling stories about people, that are only showcased or told in that way after they have been, let's say attacked or murdered, for it. It is okay to show thanks and praise but often mediated generations are symbolizing and highlighting in the area where someone can start interaction that go to the basic level of "turf" in regards to global stances. Like someone who "would" protest things like "World Bank" #blindly knowing something that makes them just create on a micro level, that macro level of implementation and cause what can be a wipe out. Not seeing the consequence and that they fight would be a fist fight, even if it is billionaire driven and can be solved by "who got a car wash today". I will blame Detective Goren for people who step up out of nowhere to investigate normal occurrences or things that do not actually occur, or act as if people in the same area or field of study will most likely have more than one person who wants to build a school. As a closing statement I would tell people to separate feminist and women who want to participate in society from ones who end up gaining or seeing the opportunity from what is being presented to the ones who requested this. This is making women or girls who would be labeled "disabled" or "abusers" or "molesters" into the workforce. They then are attacking or seeking to label the most competitive of women in the field with these ailments when they are actually doing things that are blocking attacks that would not be noticed or attempted at implementing because they typically would not be in the area. I do make decisions like a person who can see the budget by understanding school takes tax money and how it impacts the community overall. Where is "free" education is not a silly question and neither is "what do you mean by they?" Many people would probably take their children out of school or choose children to fund if they understood money way coming out of their paycheck for this or they would take the overall purpose and experience more seriously. People notice when I properly celebrate and support pieces of people that may have been cut off. There are also people who should be able to see a skill and when someone states where they strengthened one in particular. Something should not be identified as "too college", when someone discusses knowing to go to a metaphorical writing center even if the paper is an A. I also do not want to carry on with people who assess my behavior and cannot see they have a problem with what I am doing because they did not "read" an assignment that I am discussing, developing something from or learning to shift my life with. There really are people who do not want people to know that they have been conditioned to speak to people like they are sitting in a school desk and always only acknowledge a teacher and act as if a peer cannot be excellent and literally report everything for no reason and that this happens when there is someone that is a direct competitor for the teacher. The "smart" and "excellent" challenges them because they want to be "catty" about it not coming from the person in charge. They also do not see when this is purposeful nor when they fail to be able to understand conversation that occurs in passing or face to face. The minimize, diminish or act as if communication isn't an overall set of circumstances and interactions. Nothing more irritating that being a person who is smart and also has free legs, that keeps getting challenged because of attractiveness that someone wants to capitalize on. This also makes it hard for people to understand my sarcasm or my level of interpretation. As in having multiple aunts or grandparents and having to shift because of what I can comprehend in the atmosphere. There are people who lack to understand when spirit and strength dies and when communication happens across culture. Group work and learning means knowing when "this is the time to mention something" or others to be silent before they mention something that alerts people that they are failing in spiritual communication. Someone who should speak like an oracle should not even put a schema on a conversation and if this occurs will be attacked. Let me help people who fail to see that I grew up with someone called Nana who died when I was 9 and learned at 11 about another grandmother. One who would have me sit with her in a KKK meeting, as in I am sitting here and not sitting here at the same time and realizing why this conversation is occurring. There is no Nana, there is a "white grandmother" whose fridge I grab things out of without asking. There are people using the blocks that internalize oppressed people, or people without access will use to get away with things and it works. I can see this now. I am in actual "meeting", that other's cannot get into and knowing that is a risk worth taking to completely delve into the overall scene and notice when someone that someone cannot see has me all planned out for a wedding dress and would wait for everyone else to fail, in the area that they know I am most developed in or in need of development in. The one where I do no do this because the people around me have not been allowed into the space and more importantly how mad I will get if they aim to cut me off from everything I fall in love with and the person would smirk. You can't do this, some thinks I can't do this. And all of this is funny to the person who knows whatever I just wrote it fine and people scan textbooks or use the structure of forced textbook readings and fail to see storytelling, forensics, creative writing and novels in motion. This is correct. People are writing and make it seem like they speak, which is why this person knows I am always going to sound like a lie because people in this society, especially mediated, cannot see that my statement is the one in chapter five that is after something they missed in chapter one and all makes sense at the end of chapter thirteen and they are trying to make it into the answer to a textbook question so they can pass a test and not a story or lived experience.  They fail at life and are not seen as a threat which is why they think everything is "all good". People are failing at participating in learning. Telling me no or stop in a particular instance is like telling me to die. The person knows I am in complete motion, you will get killed attempting to interrupt. This is called normal. There will be a sign of fear if you do the thing that causes you to interrupt a scene that you would not be in and not see the overall learning. There should not be "text" in certain situations. I do not "cross-breed", I use the tool for what I am doing when I am doing this. The entire thing would be called a corner store and my legs work and that is scary. If it is a call, it is out of context. You would have to write it down and decode from the first time you ever met me to comprehend. This is hilarious. Dead in spirit if that message is misconstrued is what would be said and then I turn into someone's amazing administrative assistant that plans everything they get credit for.  The laughter of "why are you lying" in front of people who know I can laugh with them and will say "why do you speak to me as if I cannot read or conduct business", who know that I would prefer to teach in the form of dance in this instance but can see the cut off and intersection that this person cannot even see what is being diluted. Lie isn't even a word in the area, it is a deception and combat to fight others. I actually did a good job, and they would not have gotten the information had the realized this is like fishing and banging on a trash can. I would show them harmfully what they have been cut off from if addressed. Stop talking to people out of car windows. I am saying two where people did not do the equation and I am then also being "a woman" who knows whose initial space this is when they want to use race and then they are just not prepared when I am complete and they have a big lie where they see a group member succeed. This is the comedy of light skin, biracial and whatever else that is or knowing about it and people aiming to use it. I am who I am while participating whatever people make that, so people want to have something to say while in the middle of learning like one is supposed to and having and overall result at the end. I am showing that I am not backing down from whatever is the "consequence" of when I throw in a ten. It is the dilemma of someone thinking I am going to back down when this is what should be occurring. I can see "water gate" and when to see what is up with whatever is a invisible knapsack and privilege. Talking to me in a certain matters shows ultimate emasculation. I should not be relevant. The sarcasm of knowing this is the ropes and pick up trucks and living. They where or when something is being said, it is funny an obviously not true when people have actual records. Everything says we took afro puff girl to the hair salon to get a perm. Everyone around in the right area makes the proper assessment and then we go about our business. The answer is funny. What one would want to use a racism is going to become a conversation piece when my "family" gathers. Mine, as when you do not know my uncle on my step-dad's side is bragging about me in Australia and because you have seen me all your life you think these people are not there type of thing. I will continue to use the metaphor of someone complaining as we all sit down for a test I am about to get an A on that they are about to get a D on and acting as if I am doing something crazy other than being prepared. Someone is challenging me in my "school day". As in acting as if my principle, career counselor, guidance counselor, and the guy who did the presentation on a college aren't what I am focused on in the middle of a school day and just happen to have contacts from others. Ok, I also learned about diseases in elementary school and how they are spread and not to stigmatize people or be fearful of certain interactions. I am also a real time researcher and person who would want to cure disease. You would also have to own a dvd player to know why someone would sarcastically state that their on no scratches on the dvd they are holding. Or that someones sarcasm is being put on a platform and not as if it is coming out of a students mouth who is in direct contact with access, learning, tests, symbolism, messages from instructors and more about what are you going to do if someone makes you an accomplice to "murder" without your knowledge and what you have to break within yourself to get out of it. This is the annoying part of knowing you will embarrass YOUR actual self because of addressing people like me in front of others like we are "slave" women that you can't have which is why everyone doesn't see a nudist colony or that it is okay to walk around naked. I love learning feminism which puts this into context. As in women attack other women when they do not realize what they have received access to or that they are aiming to gain something when everything put in place in a particular area even for the best of scholars is for the biological responses meaning that women are being attacked and moved all about or shown because a male wants their breast to stop growing. There is room provided for this division even in academic spaces and this is where women who watch television go to go against each other and cannot see that the male who is in solid foundation see's a wife and is interested in seeing the entire thing through and knows she can come live and suffer eating cereal. Shopping will not be the result for the female failing, lying and getting caught. There are people copying the seated behavior of people who will "pee" on themselves and they have an attitude that causes them not to but they sit through things like people who have or would and grow unhealthy and do not realize why or do not then have the appropriate ability to learn how to just use the bathroom. Someone's behavior put me in a structure that makes them view me like television which is why they are watching what I would be doing at the end of a school day correctly hours before I witness a shooting or something. However, they are doing this as they already know I saw it and acting like beforehand I am still not doing something in the school day and then going to respond. I have to give insults because there are people who have never seen or lived with unemployment and cannot see when a mom has experienced a traumatic situation and is aiming to get their daughter while being so programmed to keep getting back to work, that they keep interrupting a growing scholar. That can probably do biochemical warefare without a chem lab. The answer will be revealed where you cannot participate as in because I will prove it. If you think that because someone can "preach" that means that they are able to discuss what someone learned about international ware fare and override their knowledge yes their is a distortion and if you can read and write someone will notice and comment properly. No one who gets paid thousands will stop people from cutting off billion dollar fixes that someone will give for free. People are speaking as if they are "educated" or "employed" when they are not and failing to see what the overall response will be. People are putting items at my democratic republican sarcasm. Sorting through whatever is the "tower of babble" is something I have to learn to not stop doing even if it makes me feel silly. I feel silly having to explain or teach because I can see where people have put on suits in politics, business and religion and are "playing along" when they no longer know something or liked the look. I feel funny knowing that they are "paused" because they can see whatever they thought I was looking silly doing is correct and are scared to reach out and say something because then I must look "cool" or something. This is important for profile development and that is what people who flip through channels cannot see about having access to information. They are not choosing to sit down and properly watch something or watching the entire thing through. Yes, i can tell people do robberies and will include children or harm them. I do not make my knowledge make me live in an alternate reality. As in people cannot see when they are in broad  daylight doing the equivalents of getting a person who can "read" caught or asking them to blurt this out loud where they can see it is illegal, even if it wasn't illegal for them but they are in a territory where people like them are banned or something from doing this. I'm aim trying to get so good at something that I do not need a speech or lecture from someone or even a suggestion. People are pointing out that I did something to figure out how to show the right person something and then want to point out I am now just sitting because they cannot see the psychological thinking and outlined skill it would take to get that somewhere and not have a fight or riot start physically. Clearly I am not allowed to put myself in danger. I am not just sitting. I am complete. And now I am blogging like I am using a coloring book. Someone wants to say something to me that is residue to me because it is when you do not have all the information in your initial planning. Someone does not want me to share or show who benefits from the confusion of what happens when a "interpersonal communication major" can hear or know that what is being said to them is "what is your bank account number". This is where I have to mention that I completed courses my freshman year of college that people do not get into until 4th or 5th year. I am complete. They see the mud slide in an entire new lesson or level. #Pokemon #ForRealForReal #NotConfusedAboutRace. I do know about second hand smoke and hope to God that I do not get things like Cancer and would want other people not to also. I also can tell from those Truth commercials about anti-tobacco that many people do not know the impact or that they would not be there and I know that some people really are dealing with a stress and would be okay with another method and really just might not now. I know it must be really bad if someone paid for commercials where I know there would be like a rally or sign or discussion. Like as in the attention of mediated culture is that hard to get and most people would not even buy them if their wasn't some time of delayed response or action. I am not being mean when I say things, but I do things like someone who can see someone went out of their way to make a commercial. Just like everyone cannot read, everyone cannot diagnose cancer or read the symptoms and automatically see things. Someone does want to see how I would handle all my "life endangerment" of aiming to save the world if I could not see the clear escape route and all the people to give the diagrams to support whatever I did and my disappearance which is a sign of respect, nah mean. That means you are "scary" to "scary, scary" in the white strap heels with a speaking event. #ClapClapClap. It is funny to me if people cannot see that my life is "hip-hop" because I do not walk around dressed for a party or music video. Some people give the wrong challenge to people who are students. They make it treasonous to be at the "lake" and doing what is required to get a bucket so you learn how to get water. And no, I do not personalize "attacks" that include me like as if "America" is where I live and then people laugh when people think that is not where they are from and do not help or respond. I am responding to the anger issue that people developed waiting for me to one day give birth so they could enact some harmful behavior back, that I have not done nor would be planning to do. There are people wanting to buy rings, but the can no longer get to the proper version of me, as in fist fight. This is not offensive or personal. This is where I do not take away your ability to say that, no, your anger does not mean you sit with an attitude and not learn to read when the opportunity is presented. I also will not respond to blurts and conversations that make things untrue appear. And yes, I would try to adjust the mirror for one particular person and hide under the covers. Writing poetry should not seem "off" to someone who should have been alert for twelve years of sitting through school. That is how you learn about credit and employment to get those alligator shoes you always wanted. There is also something wrong when people watch out context or speak out of context when a human who thinks they developed from a lion, or donkey tells another you seem like a monkey. All that commotion where I have a funny joke about how a sexy man looks like something from the Galapagos Islands. #Exotic. I also do understand the African Diaspora and will not address people who defer to colorism. I must also explain to my actual "older high school boyfriend" who does not expect to have to say a word to me why I am around someone in a "dirty" shirt or something as I am living my life trying to see what's up with the "underground railroad". I didn't know you clearly did not read enough, count or do math or you would bump into me later and we would just sit together. Maybe I need to take a break from being smart before he come find. Words and languages #OhMy. Some people do not realize they prematurely or do premeditated things and aim to start fights with people and want them to respond to what never appears. Then they will not just go off and do something differently. I also do not like that people cannot see in a partner assignment that work should be done separately. That is many people's confusion. Also young people who argue about natural cleaning products who haven't been told yet they do not own any and practically live outside. As in a person with a washing machine in the house has this natural cleaner idea. That people who cannot afford cleaners in the first place should need, listen to or realize they would end up doing on their own or their family members already do or do not clean at all. There are people who have no life until the school day who think girls running around with their "homies" are gross and wonder why the group never disappears or disperses. Then they cause trouble because of who they met in a school day and fail to see that they cannot stay around because someone they wanted to clown a little or make corny is the Queen, the Boss, the Don Juan and going through some things that everyone is supporting them through. The person who can sit with no clothes on and still be revered. People who do not have friend groups or family time before the school day think "groups" or "mobs" of people are doing something bad or cause trouble because they feel left out. They do not understand these relationships occur before watching television or staring at a wall and wonder why people look like they are all over each other when they are not. They often invite other people to infiltrate or take over, especially when they do have enough clout to have a certain shoe for the school day no matter how they got it. And yes I can shout across social media smart comments to give someone a heads up. #TheyReadEnoughToRiseTestScoresAllAcrossTheCountry


My war, if ever, is going to be about all the attention or smart comments girls have made because someone did not know they had hair weave. Please keep making girls "bald headed" so that when the person who is in the area or saying it takes their tracks out all involved can be embarrassed. It is that hard to see that someone would not be able to tell that something is a weave and then make comments or hardly see their hair as an indication of how often they see in a mirror or what they understand in the interaction. I have to suffer from someone just wanting to "win me" or something. I probably would relax if I wasn't aiming to make sure this person doesn't see eye crust when I wake up next to him in the morning or something. Yes, people should go to the library and know the way to use it based on a school day where they learned about it, inside one. It is pretty problematic that I have to announce not giving people oral sex because people include that in exchanging numbers, like automatic contact. Which is why things get dramatic in an otherwise healthy and normal interaction between two people who would still want to get clams and not know what the "stares" are about. It is frustrating for people not to see you can just "lay up" and hang out. Especially when they have only experienced classmates and not a friend group or mob that sticks together. 


Oh yea, there was something I wanted to say to someone and also some really funny things (well things I think are funny that I did not realize impact others) to one person in particular. If you can see the visual it is the appropriate person for me to choose. Yes, I would have wanted to say it like how someone would send a note in class. Like, "yo let me tell you what this lady said." Yes, I can see the who, no I cannot see the before I existed plan that may be in place that would trigger a different response to me.  My frustration is when I do things to get everything into a "thesis" so people who do not read will not make a presumptuous action because they cannot listen to the full duration of a statement, comment or interaction. This is how I speak. I just go to RCA, Self-Care, think about danger I learned about or speak in my crowd instead of going to AP where this would be heard so to speak. Someone wants me to diss them where I would not and needs that as a reason to go do something or validate and attack. I am like "free medicine" lady who understands addiction and the impact. I would suggest something like a "sweep" that I learned about in high school to help people, organizations or governments who are dealing with a leader dying or a transitional experience. Often times people are experience the residue of a trauma and do not realize this. That is why it becomes hard to see when I am serious about helping combat pneumonia. And people who can see a trauma, a impact or something that is going on should seriously take action once they can identify this. People who support me are coming into a "spoiled brat" who learns well and can see something and gets funds that would disappear if she follows their direction all in dealing with an occurrence that happens after already being customized and seeing the opportunity and resource to stay that way and contribute to society the way I know how. Yes, I buy shareable. There is something obvious to me. My entire life journey is me getting back to one person and in the entirety having a goal of sliding up on this other person. There is nothing abnormal about what I am doing and have always done. No, I am not saying I will not say help. However, there is only one person I was seeking to speak with and other interactions clearly can and will occur. I am the person who leaves paint and paper and expect people to paint. #ExceptForMyManThatIHopeIsStillSittingSomewhere #TheseAreMyPostersForHim #ItWouldBeUnfair 


My fear is young people who are excited and "push" or "speak" at me when I have already situated them in a way that knows that there are people who will say "what is wrong with assault?". They fail to see after learning and assisting that people will still do it or that some people will still think nothing is wrong. They also can't see how hard that is to do, to even create the space that they had to do whatever got done and also cannot see how hard it is to know what my "sleepy" behavior is getting ready to cause me to do or say. As in, I become "not right now" in the spot that they have already been pushed away and then I have to figure out how to explain that yes I keep my rest routine so my "dark circles" leave and I do not want to end up having to wear make-up everyday if my sleep cycle changes this. And then explain that thing about how I will have to go back and forth sarcastically about why I won't just permanently keep the tired schedule and and fatigue on my face. I look "anti-feminist" because of wanting to be "anti-disruptive" because I like the idea of romance and aiming to seduce someone in a fuzzy sweater. This is millennial contribution that tells all the fancy housewives to get some toe shoes and backpack and hike and all the hikers to watch Food Network and bake because all of the time, space and energy shows that this is the time to see that is the result, the shift and what you want. You couldn't get to the kitchen because you had an "issue of blood" and now everyone knows there is a mop and that the female your man left you for found out all female bodies are prepared to do that for reproduction unless malnourished or in danger. I do not want my attitude, or meanness or niceness to be impacted by racism and sexism or economics. As in yes I want my fuzzy box and leopard and pink thong to be seen, seriously. That doesn't mean while I am wearing it, unless for the correct person. People may want to take the time to flesh out the statement "bad luck". Specifically what is that meaning to you. Also is this the impact of wanting something and literally not seeing that the "subconscious would do anything to get it" needs to be checked and addressed if in a conscious society. It will also make you sound like a bad decision maker if you cannot fully articulate what the "bad luck" is. I guess this is when I should mention that I think things like the "medieval society" is cool and would want dress up and walk around to. No, I still would not see what is being stated if you can comprehend me from that standpoint. Whatever that is looks "weird" to you and that can actually mean you do not have multiple pairs of shoes otherwise that is what it looks like. #Cool. I am the person who see's politics and goes "Black President", not "Black People Taking Over The Continent". The dude who own Starbucks is still white to me and someone at Forbes probably arguing with whoever is a 16th president. I understand that way. I have learned as a "grown" individual who becomes one and does not copy one, that I have found a way to eliminate stress and not feel "off" about people's comments. It is knowing that for specific interactions I should wear my pink bow Betsy Johnson purse and favorite shoe and not the Coach Bag a family member purchased me. That way when people are hating or want to bring me down or just be sarcastic and act like I borrowed something from them I will say #yasssssss. And I used it on a rack for a show and then purchased my own shiny dress or be able to see people from my childhoods comments who want to make it a resource or get some credit and laugh because I am affirmative about my sparkly bow on my bag and I will not become economically disparate and wearing something a family member purchased. And the price range of what I buy, how I buy and my style will become apparent no matter what and the symbolism is there. And I can be comfortable knowing this is my style and what I like and that it meets the mark and it is accentuated with Juicy Couture or Tiffany's perfume. I am realizing I am getting attacked about a hair salon appointment for a wash and flat iron where people think I am getting a relaxer. I am also laughing about my sarcasm about how many relaxers I have had. I will actually advocate for a friend of mine who has a dilemma and her career desires is what is causing a major issue. She acts just like the person who would never get a perm and would to this day walk around with two afro puffs as a grown up. She is not developing any other interest and would be a really good community representative but cannot take up her space because of her hair. It is important to see the difference between someone who let's their fro curl, flat irons, gets braids and develops and adjusts versus someone who would literally still sit there with two afro puffs and a gold chain who keeps getting into a space because of attire and annoying this crap out of people, when they are well meaning. I also do like diversity and understand the difference between infiltration and migration, however, I grew up eating Red Lobster Biscuits and virgin Strawberry Daiquiris while advocating for what appears as "them" in those moments. Essentially they are not there, in my life. However, if they are a student in view they get support all the way through. Some people's comments look foolish because it shows why people support me, In all honesty how would I look appearing on a magazine cover or with a show without addressing a certain entity whether I know them personally or not. I would look like someone who hasn't actually, then, earned that critique in that manner so to speak. I am in a fleece and leggings because of aiming for discipline in what I am seeking to do and accomplish. Yes, I have to get rid of a parasite that would have grown of me from people who speak as if "other" people are in the room or interaction due to technology. People are trapping themselves from looking at television because they think it looks cute. Or they have learned that people do not have to fight over them or put in energy. That is why they choose people that would let them starve. Yes, I do know I deal with the immediate traumas of my cousin, brother person telling me after his moms funeral that someone said they where going to kidnap him. Anyone who thinks because they can label a family member that this means it is okay for them to "kidnap" or that this is not what it is and what they also understand this to be can handicap society. I should share this, someone lives in error because they seek to challenge someone who is economically participating in society by renting a room for $400 a month during graduate school and sitting themselves in someones home as a wife as if this is "better" or as if the overall sentiment of knowing to rent a room, be in grad school and actively participate in reality isn't powerful. There are people who do not want me to pick up a symptom of being ashamed of my beautiful life, the one that comes the same way brown skin comes. People are often fighting their way out of it. It in itself, is what it is. The stories people tell about my life, what I have overcome, where I have failed, what I have understood, misunderstood, known or not known comes in the same form as what "complexion" would be. I have learned from lessons on internalized oppression about race or skin color to make sure not to dilute my story or internalize some oppression about it. I also know I am someone's little thing that came out of their "private" area while they were trying to pick themselves up by the bootstraps or something. My name is "blank stare" and classrooms and attendance keep putting things there. There are people who want to attack what love looks like when it comes in the form of "blank stare", when that is the formation. Let me mention that girls and women who do watch television often make themselves important where they clearly are not. They go to say that a female is doing something when guys are actually being attracted to her. This is the same as when guys look at men with salaries and think that that care about how they want to address reporting themselves as thieves. I behave like a person who has had an alphabet in my face, storybooks, snack who doesn't realize that all people do not have this at the moment. Also a person who if a bad thing happens is going to be a "birdy on a perch" all expensive and attitudy around people would rob and then see "scary" who is also then looking for what happened to the bigger people. Then also cannot behave like they are not sitting there being scary like a person with expensive. If I didn't have "expensive's" I would have done something different. That is the story. I have learned that the muscle I have to strengthen is the one that comes from being educated, exposed and well learned to information especially after I realize that every has learned it or had access. So when someone says "yes we are from the field and we can't get paid or marry. And then even use the word slavery with enjoyment" I realize that if people are not exposed to the entire concept they may think this is the best thing on earth, getting exposed to literature or the behavior of someone who exposes you something else can cause danger. There is also more danger when a person speaks about being in the "field" when they are correct and get left by people who, as I always say, misunderstood the emancipation proclamation that this person has no clue of so actually hears and see's the directions being given and understands them as such as they are being given and actualized. I am the person who would ignore a slave and slave owner and tell them both that bacteria can cause viruses and kill people, you have Clorox wipe, you have a Clorox wipe and here is some toilet tissue. I know I must look crazy to people who cannot imagine living with toilet tissue. I use the whole roll, all up in one sitting. #AwNawHellNaw




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December 10, 2019

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