A Monologue: Two Ways to Describe Me, Myself & I; Pink Heels & A Purposeful Outlook On Life.

December 9, 2019

There is something sad about the distortion of people who have to see that what they have normalized is not so often the case. As in some may speak and interact dis-accordingly and do so with confidence. They may cause people not to see that the actual recipe will result in a catastrophe upon initial interaction. Imagine soldiers in the army doing things that cause people to be alarmed when a soldier fires gun shots properly at something or a behavior happening in the specified territory and in a obvious interaction that would by design cause them to do so. There is also something about being a person who is not interested in using weapons and what they have to go through to survive a society that has them, people who think that they have access to them or people who have created their lives as if they will be protected by weapons that are actually being held by an obvious enemy. I will go on to state in the spirit of "Ida B. Wells" that what has been televised and viewed this way has caused a great distortion. There is also something that makes people think that their teacher will not steal their girlfriend. So apparently someone is gossiping about me and making people think something that is not true. I guess instead of focusing on what is actually occurring there are people waiting for me to go and do what other people have done when I have clearly shown this is a no in more ways than one. There, because a dilemma when people like me follow a truth or a rule properly and learn that they are being harassed so to speak by people who are expecting them to live the life or results of those who have failed to so something properly I would have no idea why anyone would be thinking I would be doing anything other than what I am doing. There are people who make being "correct" have something to do with age. As in correct in the first place to some people looks "childish". What it is, is not run down and living in a lie. The most irritating way people do this is when they have no identity in the situation and aim to address or attack people in their actual state of living. I think it is more than funny to know somewhere over the rainbow their are people playing "doctor" who argue against the most basic tool to do the work they do. Yes, I would leave from people who are in a industry and fail to know the basic rule or even know the underlying theory, philosophy, value and concept. I do not live in a state of confusion nor am I swayed by people who do not even know what the definition of ignorant is when they choose to use it. I have had amazing men and women teach me with and without words to see who or what has done something to me and be careful of who or what I revere. There are men who have taught me that some people in my "community" will call me hoe and beg of them. I should notice when the people they beg of have given me my proper place in society, even when they aim to fight me out of it. There is nothing in my mind that does not acknowledge men who have been emasculated or whipped, beaten with nightsticks and retreated. These men who aim to run homes, churches, find employment and do everything other than fight back in the right direction. There are kids around me and grown people around me who have taught me in more ways than one to ignore kids who are uplifting their father that was beat and raped in public and is living in fear but they cannot see this. That is the issue I face often in a progressive society and one that I am able to participate in regardless. I look at women who call out to "Black men" when they are clearly in an identifiable state of submission. This is obvious to my third grade eye. The one who does not speak as if everyone can read, has went to school or is well fed even if they take up a so called leadership role. There are women and girls I have experienced who do not see that I have people in my corner and that whatever they have dismissed is the information vital to their survival. The days and moments when things like feminism is the answer to the prayers they never prayed. I am kept safer than most people can acknowledge and it is eerie when people know my name and have stories about me when I have never seen their face or am seeing it for the first time. There are people who fail to see when an entire "army" of supposedly strong men is being dismissed and not listened to. No one can see the insult in ignoring calling someone like me a "crack head hoe" when it is more than obvious that I am not and showing that I have no time along with others to consider making these comments relevant while in the middle of conducting productive ways of living for successful communities. There are people who would want to say I have been beaten as a little pretty princess and the one response would be "out of ever participating in a cult that can't even afford to be one". Yes. I will still be grabbing a coffee and ignoring people who in certain locations cannot see they are just a cashier. There is a difference. I live knowing that their are people who will argue that they sell cloths so women can breastfeed in public. Many people will not see that they run around bringing dirt and germs everywhere using money that they did not spend in the right area. I really also will not speak to people who do things out of order. I am still a person waiting to see if needed would the government contribute to a "much needed slap that someone might need" and I do this publicly with the knowledge that people are failing to see who or what I speak to and how. There is a huge problem with people who have gone through the educational system who aim to make their presence known out of context in a religious affiliation. They often want to group themselves like classrooms, have a chance to speak or get the wrong answer and think that something in the realm of grade or age matters in the situation. They also might think people are being nice to them when they are not or that there will be guidance counselors, and policy and procedures that deal with them instead of completely ignore them. Their are also people who cannot see that they are aiming to make friends and lifetime ones at that in the middle of an actual "war zone". When you cannot comprehend how to intersect education, religion and community you may not see that their is often an easy fix. Easy, being the word because the correct answer should be readily available along with materials. I have people who will say that people have been overexposed to my comedy or my silence or my beauty or my education and not in congruence. Some who should simply just see a person counting, reading, living, walking and using their legs because they are well. There is something about not paying attention to the fact that many people did not ride a bus to school that makes it hard for some amazing people to do their amazing work when they are being chastised for not having a vehicle. I would like to know what kind of car Jesus, Moses, Benjamin Franklin, Harriet Tubman and others like them drove. I really am just in the mood for fruit, back rubs and palm trees. However, many well meaning citizens are in the middle of arguments about gas and oil from young people who would never realize how hard it is for most to get a plate of food. I enjoy the Biblical scripture about a man robbing God, and this meaning he has robbed himself. I often wonder if it is okay to whisper a funny comment about whether or not "Hebrews" has something to do with tea and if a certain someone would like to go for some. I cannot comprehend people who do not follow protocol all the way through and ignore superiors who may be dealing with something else and not following the proper instruction and cause that to stifle them. No, I will not respond to people who veer off and fail to get their overall access and gifts. There is something obviously silly to me about people who fail to see that they are getting information from something they have been completely excluded from. I also do not like when I have to deal with people who have made up in their life that they are being taken care of by their family based on going to school and also watching someone else's family on television and having the language. They start arguments and fights that I get ripped out of or are addressed by a mob of people who then notice they are more lonely and isolated than they think. Then I become a "meanie" for wanting to issue the proper response. They scenario they started as if all of what I have is also in place for them. They have still done the behavior that needs to be addressed. I also have learned to stop squinting my way into understanding of people who call out spelling errors and should not have time to do this because they should be able to identify a work in progress. I have noticed that often an under-served community has less to do with race relations and more to do with people who sit and do nothing for eighty hours and show up so they can keep getting a paycheck. There are people who speak because subconsciously they know what a bullet is and they do this in a world where wars occur when no one has even heard of gun powder. That is why people may misconstrue my natural heart eyes and attempts to seduce someone with humor, rage, humility and hoping that my war stories and discussions make me sound romantic. I often try to figure out what is the equivalent of asking for someone's number in the "stone age". This might be where things like a "staring contest" derived. I have lived in a world where bilingual women and girls "speaking English" have started literal fights over a person looking cute. As in stomped the ground, huffed and puffed and people who are aiming to combat nuclear war and self-destruction do not know that they actually have no words and will really "kill" over cuteness. However, while they are doing this and no one notices it gives room for distraction so "their people" can go get jobs and labor. This makes complete sense and should cause people to get distracted less. I know there are people who have been told to see if they can "work the grocery store" and mistaken that for having something to do with an application. People turn their identity into "so and so' girlfriend" or "person with cool sneakers" when they are literally a cashier clerk and should not make any other statements unless someone needs a price check. There are employers wondering why people they have hired are at work acting like the police, the avengers, top models and people who eat when this is not the case. This behavior is why I get attacked for "garnish and glaze". There is a very serious component about people who often want to work with me initially and get thrown off or in the midst of something and want to turn to me. I am serious about my No. If you have ever chosen someone who is a "no" to me and placed a decision they make before something I do. It irritates my senses and makes sweatsuit and "little bun" day hard to comprehend after I have won a marathon, have put somethings on hold based on a timeline and am working on something that will culminate into something amazing that you will not be ready in time for if you even need to make a comment about appearance in the obvious facet. No, I did not say "amazing one day" because I am working on it. There is also a problem when people cannot hear or have not developed enough sense to be able to hear they are wrong in the way a person can deliver this message to them or teach them something in a particular way. I will always and forever make note of the fact that some people have made people feel special only to use their resources for someone else. This is a double-bind of no negotiation to me. Number one, if you have a situation that you attribute yourself to having some authority in so to speak why would you need to go anywhere else to acquire something in specific instances. There are people who fail to see when they have pretended "excellently" to be the person I and others like me are. They fail in the reality and often to not want to mention the consequence. It is when people act as if they have ignored me and then do everything in their power to reach me so I can help them "hide their baby" because no one can see the fear level. The stress, the ultimate realization of what has occurred and the freeing of a complete delusion someone else set up in their minds as if having one pair of Air Force One's and knowing the names of people they walk by in the hallway on a school day make them "in the loop". I know there are people who would laugh with me about things but they do not want their "teeth to fall out" or to take a "pay cut". I am all about curly fries and sweet potato fries that you pay for on a school day when their is free lunch, even if people laugh at this. I cannot undo watching videos about menstruation and reproduction in elementary school and thinking everyone knows about these things. I was excited the first time my menstruation showed up. I also will laugh hard when I can understand economics and lunch counters and find out that I have been addressed by younger men and older ones about "my chest growing long or something" while I am in the middle of solving the equation to prevent assassinations and bat my eyelashes. This also impacts the time frame in which I aim to impress someone's mom and see if she can smuggle me into her house so I just happen to be there if she gets a visit from her "fine ass son" or something. I guess my life would be better if people could outline everyone's curse word that they purchased that is laying around. I am annoyingly correct like someone who reads in the jungle. Dancing while people do not even know they can stand up. I think there is an episode of the television show Martin where he is trying to teach Gina that her hair should be kinky and with braids and another where he may be addressing the "lumps on her chest". My annoying life experience is preparing to wave, wink and blow a kiss at someone only to find out that they will be in a different location than expected. My plans of showing up in a shiny gown and look inconspicuous doing so while knowing that the exact obvious is happening seem to have gone array. I am also a fan of Keke Wyatt, if you get my drift. Yes before I was born there was a thing called prostitution, and it some people's lives it was developing and we have all been subject to the harsh attacks of someone wanting to get a "red cent". The lure, the attention, the lies, the almost force, it gets pretty ridiculous at times and people should not feel bad if they have experienced this. They have no remorse. Law and Order and Forensic Files is really a privilege to have in ones's lifetime. I also have more than one pencil and see a cup full of them which is why I would hardly notice someone would kill you for less. There is nothing not okay about sharing that you can see that you may have "ordered" so to speak a couple of Virginia Tech's. As in put yourself in situations accidentally using technological communication that might make someone chase you across a campus or environment to harm you. At the same time knowing that you may be using something you learned about how someone might get belligerent with you anyway if you ignore their pursuits. Where some happily sing "mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the lord", I often whimper into the oblivion to remove violent scenes I have seen with my own eyes. I am frequently shocked by people who think it is problematic to ride young women out of what can turn into a shoot-out. There is a problem with people who speak out of context and in a way that can seem illiterate or that will be dealt with by people who will correct their brand. I also will know that someone must be addicted to food or commercials by the way they respond to vital information. Who in the world would attack a person who shares that a gun shot may have been a response to the sentiment shared and not in full and as an apology that would be much needed. There are men who would learn to support their women, even in feminist movements, and see what stress reliefs this brings to them rather than fight at them. I also know their is a word such as stalker and that people attack at me were I am better than them so they can buy food from restaurant owners that do not want them their and make arrangements with the cable companies to kill off people not paying their cable bills or buying products they do not want them to have because they have seen the amazing cinematography on a television, that the creators do not want them to have either. The emotion people express or sympathy they want is annoying when they realize they want to connect with those who have a social identity in relation but are not included in this group even when their is a shared conceptual framework. I must share that the people, typically women, that have a problem with me view life from age and grade level. They fail to see that I am high performing and that is why I may be navigating the same area as them at the same time. They also might notice that after having completing tasks at my highest level I am choosing to participate in an activity, where in all actuality they should be doing an assignment. I do my job correctly and people aim to argue at "it" like they would speak to someone that is on a screen and do not notice this or when I am being protected and they are being saved because I am holding the ropes, until a complete and utter non-compliance reveals itself. I know there are people who have failed to realize to not put the person who may be putting you in a emergency as an emergency contact when you are in full adult consciousness. I am irritated by knowing I have been "harassed" by adults who are just learning about hygiene and employment. Who see me navigating a space with a hygienically clean body and money. Ultimately I am someone they would not want to see them in the area, so they make problems where there are none. I also deal with the realization of women who may study or label improperly who begin to decide that they have been "raped" by their husbands and subconsciously because they did not get a birthday gift that would actually go to the sexy intern that they are cheating with and in an argument with. There is something that was revealed and is having a ripple effect on my life with people checking me for things that I am not even involved in. No, I would not hide out for years and then pop out to reveal I am still participating in something to become the "winner" or in charge. Things like this make people displaced. Yes, you can cry with tears in your eyes, while I focus on knowing that vehicles make false information spread quickly and even override truthful or corrected information that has been presented on the news because of the speed and lack of awareness in real time of attitudes and implicit bias of the communicator. There are people who think "All" people typing are "sick". I believe people begin to see when they are included in someone's delusion when they start to see why to say things like "All Lives Matter", this then makes them see when they are not excluded from positive and negatives of a situation. I also do know to run and hide for when people will "come at me", I mean people who have not been somewhere in years and publicly shame participation who will "kill" someone in a validated communication or act as if this is so "crazy". I also can see when someone thinks this is funny, when it is more than and also more than not. I also had to learn about what people believe and do not. It would seem while I am a child, that I would not know how to call on a house phone to someone's employment to start a conversation. Especially, when all these devices are new to someone, who is terrified of them or still learning or has learned the proper way to make sure the person on the other end of the phone is actually who they are. I once, out of education and awareness called my mom on her work phone from the house phone, in which there is no caller id or voice recognition because she hardly hears me speaking and commented to her that I got scared thinking about death and my little brother because he fell asleep while I was holding him. I guess I have spent the majority of my life being some "crazy psycho that just called pretending to be my daughter" and had to be dealt with or found like any person making a phone call into a place of business that might be doing work that I have no clue would or could cause harm. Just don't make any calls is the sentiment and wait for whoever or whatever is supposed to show up to you.  


In what I call "Mid-Intersectional Madness" there is quite a dilemma that people face in the midst of progress. Those days you realize not everyone went to school or eats everyday. When it becomes noticeable that not everyone employed can read, those days. When there are people who love you and people who would hurt you and realizing that not everyone will care or understand when I heal openly and always understanding and appreciating what "Mine, Yours, Ours" means. That I love those who love me but I really am going to have a side effect of always trying to blow a kiss at some man they would think does not even exist or would potentially look so scary. It is also knowing that there will be arguments that you have to roll your eyes through and hope people you love see you aren't being disrespectful like when your favorite person, a beloved family member and a community worker who adores you keeps trying to override your routine for an extra-curricular activity or corrections that need to be made by academic advisers and mentors. The day you realize that not everyone will understand what you are doing or that doing things in your own time is possible. I live for the moments when haters and people who have wished bad on me realize that I do not ignore the librarian or the janitor, as in you have never been relevant and keep acting as if other people are not important or do not exist. I am also a person who writes knowing where the words and language go. Using the word boyfriend doesn't mean that something is healthy or positive. Can I also mention millions of people who have never seen a television or have never seen anything they see on the television or if they do act as if what is going in the televised version is better and fail to participate. Yes, I live in a society where there is an importance to a resume and a portfolio along with understanding what that means. I started realizing that some men and boys have failed in life because of systematic class and money systems that they cannot understand how to participate in. There are "poor" girls who a man wouldn't even want to speak to taking up space where some women have hair salon appointments and money to spend. They only get spoken to because of someone most likely needing attention or lacking literacy. There are people who will argue as if this is not true. I also know that there are people with dentures and I often forget to laugh because I am practicing holding my teeth in my mouth. Have you ever seen someone wanting and waiting endlessly for a persons title or position when they have failed to meet even the most basic requirements. I am aware of my ripeness. The day you realize people will give apologies in a thousand different directions when they are owed and should be delivered to you. I love gift giving, I do not speak to people's lies about myself and others. I am looking for nothing to gain from it when some others seek to do this very thing. Some people's commentary is like asking why a person has developed a muscle that comes from weight lifting and they haven't when they clearly have not lifted any weights. No, people do not have to say hello and most people who do most often do not mean it. There are people with stereotypes who put things on my personality or lifestyle and have a heavy cross to bare when they come into the reality. I am the person who buys Bare Minerals after my college roommate introduces me. And before I get a hair cut, I can afford to play in a wig with the asymmetrical shape that I want. This is productive. I have also seen enough Cheaters and Judge shows to really just know better, when others do not even know they exist. I also know not to fight when someone might wrestle you out of a space because you wandered into the territory of people who do not realize they are going to be disposed of. I am a writer who grew up in a society with transportation and reality television. Today when I got dressed I remembered my lessons from comments about people who frequently remind me I am popular and loved. Yes, I had to exist in a "school" day and it is euphoric to find the balance of knowing my wardrobe is beyond fancy and I prefer sensual under garments and glitter. I also do not rob people of the experience of how I feel about them, regardless of whether or not they return the sentiments. When it comes to overall life lessons, decision making and final destinations, I only use one. I reflect on my reading in high school that included "The Coldest Winter Ever" while walking in the hallways freshman year. I assessed my environment and decided to tackle life with an abundance of knowledge that made me live like a "stop, drop and roll" that matched my life. As in let's go forward and ass-backwards at the same time. There is a article by Bonnie Ledbetter that I discuss all the time about the way success should be measured in a variation. That article inspired me to showcase my truth and lived experiences in places I might examine something else, discuss someone else's intervention strategy or talk about what I am capable of doing at "work". I am excited to experience what that article did for me, as I celebrate the way I "shake it fast and watch myself" and perform excellently, productively and in a way designed for me and my life. I have noticed how there is space to accidentally displace ourselves and allow other people to define us and live among that opinion or incorrect label. I have lived through a life where people compete violently. I am satisfied knowing that I have done well and the negative speak is about how I had on sweats because of the number of times people watch music videos and award shows on television. Pardon me while the people commenting never realize that some of these people leave their house twice a year if not on a rehearsal schedule. My nail salon routine is on the proper schedule for my life and no, I do not shop because I saw a commercial and saved for something. No I cannot tell you why I am featured in a performance when the random girl I do not know that writes never is not a participant at an event that I am at. It's that thing about being on the same page about "have we met?" and knowing that I do not lurk on social media or dislocate myself in conversation. Some arguments are when the answer is that the color is pink and the person aiming to disagree or argue with you is using purple. Or arguments about whether you should hand someone $200 every time they pass go in a game of Monopoly. It is when people comment on private conversations because I say oligopoly and spell quickly and potentially make an error. I will still will be failing at those spelling errors some people are looking for while I'm "on stage". My life is full of funny moments of my mom looking through things and reading all my practice writes so I can add scenes from Zane books in my novels that will appear like "The Babysitter Club" perfectly. I am not ashamed where some people are or have learned to be. I wear braids and Afros and will have a fresh doobie wrap with no thought about dismissing who I am. I am shopping malls, school days, church services, positions, volunteer, hair salons, nail salons, and dinner all year round. I am the good girl who waits patiently for her actual date night and happens to take walks around the monuments along the way. It is those days when I know to try Hello Fresh and not slack taking into consideration changing my hair gel color to clear because where I stare at the material to learn or person to learn from people stare at me. I guess there is something funny when I am having a moment of knowing someone, even people I love, are essentially watching me like they would watch a television show. I don't argue, because I already know that they also challenge what a scholar is. So at that point, it's knowing that people make plans for you and do not pay attention to what their work schedule and regulations do. No, I do not want to hear about spelling errors or what I didn't happen to do or accomplish. I blame the impact of television commercials. Where in my lifetime, does it not make sense that I would like a nap. I am also not interested in the crisis of people who didn't realize everyone who was born before them didn't have an organized scheduled activity and that thing where some people keep traveling along with their grade level and want to present their failure and speak over the person with the proper information is awkward turtle times two. I think it is not knowing what a recession is, what resources should be used for or how hard a lot of people have fought to make them accessible. Let me whisper that people who find out about slavery and are in it or have been will also try to kill you so do not get to chummy chummy if you know what I mean. Especially when they realize it after you have done a lot for them and know all they need is bus transportation and you really not about to give them nothing out of your new pantie fund at all. There is a pain that I know many people feel when arguments about why someone would take care of a parent or family member or visit people and help out take place. That awkward thing where people make bragging and thankfulness into trash talk. I learned about the millisecond people often use to say something that should just be a thank you and silence and the chaos, confusion or jealously they create. Have you ever created a calm, a pipeline, a pathway only to realize that there will be chaos and dissension upon your return. Many obstacles are placed in our life to build us and make us stronger. It is having the pain of having witnessed or having a natural sensor that people override. The ones where you can see people forming emotional ties to the person that bangs their door down, fights them, robs them or worse. I know how to smile, laugh and still see what there is to be happy about even when all of that is going on. These things intersect. I live aiming to feel the vibrations knowing that words and speaking are formed and not everyone does it. I love to vibe where people put hunger after watching you eat soup and spinach. The timing is wordless and the proper one would be "well". I vibe with love and understand it without words. I have had to overcome many things and wonder why people cannot understand damage and triumph in the same statement. I live like a person who knows what she wants and has the suitcases to prove it. There are people who are told they have a heart murmur and never know what it really means. There are people who never hear a word about it, but you see them getting fresh air. They heal, often. It is knowing that you would like to hug someone, but people have seen weapons and armed robberies and even if they never get those items cause that type of commotion. I am in love with knowing how to be naked and in the wilderness while dressed and indoors at the same time.

There are people who often do not realize what societal participation looks like participating in things such as education institutions is one way to reach over all goals. There is something funny about doing youth and community work and then knowing how to learn with intersecting patterns that are distinguishable to who, what, where, when or how. I grew up watching The Wizard of Oz and The Wiz. I am understanding that these two things can be equal, the same and different at the same time even when others feel they have an upper hand. There is also a lack of awareness that comes from people who do not perfect a practice that comes from each institution they navigate. I can see when myself and others are equal at the same time and who or what will be the judge. If I am filing in alphabetical order because that is the practice, no I will not be bringing up my formal engagements and shopping. There are people who do not see that they are being addressed and they are being called a form of failing, incorrect or belligerent. I laugh often knowing there are people who protect me that do not care about non-violence or have lived through things that make them comprehend to do otherwise. This also might be a misunderstanding about non-violence being absent of physical violence and also not realizing that withholding feelings, emotions and responses can be violent. As I practice non-violence in all forms with understanding of what can occur, it can appear as if I am an open target. There are people who will always fight for me and I have learned in my life that when I want to go handle a situation on my own I will get fought at. There are also abandoned people who fail to see the results of families who would take their children with them while aiming to escape from slavery or slavery like situations. There are people who step out of task or order because they think everyone has learned something or think something is safe when it is not. In a world where I know the way to identify tasks and navigate multiple spaces when I have access to funds I can notice, in phases of research who would be unable to be hired by me because of their implicit bias, they will look over me and the level of work I do and submit to someone who would be getting rid of them. Yes, as an updated member of a functioning society I can participate in shifting the paradigm and the ways funds move if I can design, facilitate and implement myself. I have been taught that some things should be a one person "act" and that funds that have been allocated to me that I can use to pay others, not a have to, can simply be used for putting on the events, programs and initiatives I would like. There is a weird thing I do called submit what is due to the people who have assigned it and are required to receive it. There is constant hustle and bustle around me from people who are looking to see me working on an assignment, they may not have grown up in a society with offices and locked doors. I will say television has people navigating and doing the improper thing and acting as if another person is. The people often cannot see when they are again, being given the proper label. There are some people who are allowing people who have copied attire or behavior from watching television and having them navigate spaces where they should understand how to conduct business and they end up being dressed and in the most violent of negotiations unable to perform or questioning why it would be occurring. I can also see that people who are aiming to enter spaces from television question things that do not make sense. For instance, I am not confused about what things like tithes money are for and support. The same way I know to collect and pay fines and interest to contribute to an overall experience. Someone may be paying ten percent of their income and they themselves or others fail to realize how to utilize the resource or understand a building fund. I learned from a professor of mine about when she was a photographer in the industry and women who would be preparing for photo shoots would have ice taped to their breast, some for hours on end. There are women and girls and some men normalizing the end result of photographs that have had much alteration before and after. People often attack me when they are unaware of a situation and make fun of me for not participating in something. Then they get upset when they learn it and notice that I go to participate because of a new lesson I have learned or comprehension that this is going to know in this moment, for me, be a funny thing. 

Every time I am in the practice of resisting something there becomes a biological and social tantrum that occurs. It is like combustion as if it is the moment to decide if you are going to fully commit to excluding something or fully commit. Most people's answers in engaging in a conflict with me are as wrong as saying that I have a penis. In addition to finding it problematic to use the word penis in a sentence. I will mention repetitively about television watchers or even people who have seen a movie or show one time who frequently talk at people and keep trying to get an entire situation to arise. All you need is one interaction, the same way it only takes one time to create a baby. That is the power that can arise from one time interactions. Most of the excess is others aiming to go back and forth and also not understanding that other people are experiencing emotions and responses that showcase they have no clue why they would be involved. Some people who should be involved also, many times, miss out because of realing those faux interactions. I would encourage people to think of how much time they spent at work and then calculate the number of hours they spend watching television, on the internet or phone. Notice you have a work schedule and so if the majority of your free time is spent in front of the television while employed, That is literally what you have done with all your time. Two hours a day maximum is suggested to stay healthy. Keep in mind what decisions are being made "in your work schedule". Some people have a problem with me that I do my work and then use my free time typically technology free. There is nothing off about having brunch and writing. People should notice what they aim to cram into their schedule or what they do in attempt to fit something they want to do into someone else's schedule. I also have a philosophy and value that I have learned and taught about Mine, Yours, Ours. I have built these principals into everything I do. It is funny when people challenge what is mine and what they can see is there's especially when they appear at the same time. If you stay in real time there is nothing not "mine" that you will see and I do this in the immediate moment. Often, people cannot see who or what they are challenging in the entirety. Metaphorically no, I will not be sad if people say I have symptoms of second hand smoke or pollution. Especially if I wrote an essay and presented it into the public to explain that. The sad heartbreaking experience stems from wanting to showcase an emotion or experience a hug that may have been viewed on television. Imagine people looking at someone who has all the proper contacts and invites and publicly explaining to people that they are doing an actual criminal activity by even thinking what the person they are pointing out is doing as problematic. If you challenge a Hibachi chef you will essentially be offending a larger entity than you can believe. A lot of people would want me to help people see why they keep having the opportunity to say something or make an irrelevant comment. There is an actual infiltration of actual unwanted people coming mindlessly into territory making comments that can cause them to be hurt. As in when someone thinks it is not normal to type a paper in a computer lab. It is obvious that you have nothing to do if you constantly come at a person who you are aiming to exclude when you do not realize that this is because you didn't not believe a truth. Again. I am not thrown off by people who do full face make-up and go hang out, and make people unable to see that their behavior doing that makes my normal look out of place and that I am booked for events and professional make-up. I have learned to see that people will do inside attacks and I have to allow people to think I look like an 'idiot". It is when people are freezing and I look like an idiot who has a bigger coat and money for transportation instead of seeking car debt. No, I will not be sad if a person dies or starves after I have provided all of what they would need but they chose to think in error. This is how international and even civil wars occur. It is when people do not realize that integration and access has people who the are calling out, actually winning and doing the absolute correct over people who have always been able to navigate the space. The personal treason people commit is in not knowing that the stress they see in a person they seek to cause problems with is because the people they have chosen, are actually counting on them. People are silly to see the person who notices something about what has occurred to them and immediately creates changes. Lifelong changes. How many times have you looked past a person who is helping you in your life only to find out that you have given compliment to something or someone who has purposefully excluded you, with intention. There are people who are petrified of people's conversations. Especially about "I was going to" or "So and so would have" when everyone is still in the middle of action.  I do believe that is commercial breaks and people wanting to create and audience to see them do something. There are also people who may seek to send messages when they do not realize something should be the same as a work-out or the gym. At some point you would also want the situation to be complete. For instance, if I have a properly registered organization that can cover women and girls in business who have started, are creating or in error be covered by me I would know not to give this opportunity to people who have decided that they would not want this available to them. This would get them out of any accidental illegal activity and provide access to resources that they actual want. However, by turning down the initial offer, they have turned down anything that would rectify what they intended to do. People who do this may be confused about what listeners and people taking their "place" are actually doing especially when they can identify that they are giving up the needed resource or requirement.  I also know the difference between the person who knows to collect the stories, and put it all together to present overall. It is knowing who to speak to when only one person can vote for an entire group and also knowing who to speak to so that YOU can get what is needed for you as an individual. It is not giving up the person who knows that you actually do need slippers in the spot in your "well kept" life that are not affordable to someone in your home at the moment. This is not an insult. This is knowing how to participate in orchestrated society, as in knowing how to see buildings that have taken centuries to build and properly utilizing them. I laugh when people do not see people telling me to not help people get better if they do not want to and do this with tears of laughter knowing the overall outcome. As a person who is apart of integrated society it is imperative to showcase the results in real time. There are people doing work that helps women in education and career not develop the masculine behavior, there are also people who need stable bodies of work to be produced. It irritates many people when people praise the copy and cannot see the content or when they final stage of completion is. It is someone speaking out of turn and not seeing that they are being addressed in a family fight by older members and I just happen to know my role. No just because I am educated and have resources and understand business does that mean I give up the food my grandmother has rationed for me since my birth. This is also a person who knows that somethings people fight to get are because of the way a system designed to help people in need. I would have a competitive habit of wanting to veer off due to other people's participation in complete incorrect answers. There can be a body of people who have decided they do not want to commit or participate in something that does not mean I will not still be present, in pink and treated as the best according to who you just declined from. Some people do have to learn about mental illness and what it means. Sometimes it means giving to much responsibility or putting the wrong information to the wrong person because of what they look like, what they dress like or what they are interested in. This adds extra pressure to the person who has the ability that is being requested. I understand when to give credit to the creator of a brand or rubric where people's emotions will cause them to disassociate with the correct because they failed to learn or comprehend the overall result. I also understand war and can see when people are being prepared or presented for it. There are often surgical like procedures that occur to make sure I and others like me will not go to protect someone in the midst of their death for not knowing that they have went against you and people like you, which is why that is the end result. It is that thing about the people who never lived to tell the story. And nah, I will not miss out on the trauma of realizing that people who are in the process of doing this have never seen or paid attention to the entire military and death part of their education. I also know there are people who do not realize that they have newly found access to a space and whatever they are seeking to report is just a conversation and a big game of battle ship. Yes, in the reality I am more than interested in finding out how cameras spread information and if people hack. I am not confused, others have designed themselves and become stiff like a televised character. I will also not skip the trauma of people not realizing what someone is saying when they are being called "fictional". I am also not crazy enough not to listen to what news reports, cold case files and other shows are saying. I look at people who cannot see that having witnessed these things they should stop walking so fast around the corner to speak to their "boyfriend". Yes, let me mention here where and why as a person who educates about rape, sexual assault, passion and consent that it sometimes looks like I condone the behavior. I simply understand treason and I understand the biological nature and systematic approach to war or states of marriage. There are wives who report about rape, some of when they learn a word and attack something they enjoy because of what another has experienced, some because they want to expose women and girls who have seen something and went to copy to see that they have been "captured". I am a person who understands how to have the awareness and what to commit to. It is knowing what "domestic violence" is and what it stems from and not having a problem making sure that an employee eats, so that the owner of the entire company misses out on that day of exhaustion from whatever happens to him in his exclusion or failure. It is knowing hierarchy, what it is for and how to properly participate. There are some people who do not realize that someone can see the biological and psychological factors that would turn them into a (fill in the blank). Many philosophers and scholars and people who developed text and language have become saddened because people have learned to use them and label at a moment of action or inaction. There are people who are failing to see when the verbal articulation of what has occurred should come into place. There are people with access to resources who cannot report because they are being blocked by people's vocabulary and delusions. It is the ant and the grasshopper story. How many times would someone have to mention snow is coming when you have a calendar and four seasons appearing to you. Yes that summer time latte can be cool water and you should be able to realize to have winter boots and coats. What many people see when they have decided to have something removed is that the lesson they learn is that if the goal is to get to the "well" to drink you should realize the purpose of the water and how long it will last you. I am not responsible for people who go to the well and misunderstood the purpose and then speak about how I always take the proper amount and leave the rest for others in totality. People often cannot see when I am not calling them incorrect for sitting quietly and doing their work in the "plantation model" or on a "slave field". They call me out because I have no intention of being the best at following the rules for the slave field. The incorrect are where they realize what they word is for what they have participated in and realize why they can no longer have the interaction with me. Yes, they will be correct and yes I will be correct for doing whatever it is I am doing. I also made a decision to learn how to not make myself live like insurance is available or that the entire process of health and wellness isn't a larger fight than people who grown up seeing hospitals and doctors offices can understand. There will be no sadness when I have already shown you, in the same way a teacher would know how to teach you a very clear thing in a particular time frame.Growing up in systematic and organized learning can sometimes make me not see to see the equation and notice I can finish the overall lesson elsewhere. Growing up in a world of technology where people have "fun" talking to each other from all different locations I have learned where people have come around me in error. People have seen my life from computer screens, the same way they have seen television shows. I have realized that I have had to deal with the impact of those unknown interactions and onlookers. If I never had an online experience growing up, I'd be sitting somewhere treating people to Cheesecake. Also, having had what I do on my free time and what occurs in a particular location has caused some people to copy and compete with people who are having access to something in their life and even give up their "high points" in there own seeking to get something that is trivial in the person they are viewings life. I know to even call people peers where they should be friends and sisters because of the competitive spot I cannot see or understand. I do not put words in people's mouth, I do what I am doing. I really am committing to changing my life to a cave or castle like living condition. I am fighting off attacks that I would never be aware of by people who do not realize who or what would be aware of them and how silly I would look not to reroute. Most people who are enjoying my company do not care what other people have said something I am doing "looks like", they really are just moving into the space and being happy! They see the insult in the aftermath. I have already been given my path and yes I can swing and slide while others are unaware. I walk through doors others would have never survived and I never would have made it without the influence of a lot of people. Allow me here to discuss what a win is in an intersectional society. It is knowing that FUN is the answer when code switchers have failed and pretty much "ruined everything". I am going to make my last edit and know that there are people who do not understand how to simply and reduce an equation. I know that every equation in life can be reduced to one increment. Sometimes people are sorting out the larger body equation without realizing that someone has already constructed the answer to fit into the framework of x+y=z. There are people who would die to hear my stories because they need them more than ever. Most times the answer models price plus tax. The price and tax is going to equal two in an overall consumer equation. There is something worth knowing the word church, there are many and most are open Saturday or Sunday's always. Schooling can be over, shopping malls require a certain amount to comprehend the experience. These can be found in the overall equation and when someone has something to say, it is important to see you have been given the opportunity to learn answer. I also will not be offended by women who have self identified to always want a hair relaxer it is obvious that there will be a conflict of interest in choice versus understanding. I have been taught about cults and cult behavior. It makes people challenge, fight and cause argument about my success and others like me because of the visual distortion of where others have been placed. These are times for lessons and growth and often some people have ended up in arrested development. 

There are particular things I have had to learn and fine tune along my journey. Knowing that people have protected me from things in my blind spots all the way to even decisions I make in my literacy, like assuming all people are or that the people who call me family will be using words in raising me. For me, coming to know what becomes identifiable and when and knowing circumstances have to change as I grow. There are people who protect me and have to shift when the protection I offer or the blind spot is in the area of where I breastfeed, mother and will not circumcise my son when these things are beyond normalized to the point of beheading. Once people shift, they can see that the decision is supported and what they believed is untrue or the shift of protection would not have to occur. The major problem being when they argue about me giving up my cell phone use because they lack comprehension or need me to wait until they have put into place what they can navigate. I am also not responsible for sorting through my death threats that come from asking why I will not shove my kids feet into shoes when I can comprehend they are uncomfortable and feet grow in the instant. And I know that I will not always be knowing something and I have learned about bravery and courage by design enough to face new challenges against all odds. I can see when people say "ain't nobody in they family got cavities" that I might need to open my mouth and say "ain't nobody in your family have money to buy candy or ever had it in their possession or eye sight". My grandma is somewhere laughing at kids who grew up unable to see that their "parent" or "guardian" went to a grocery store because of a commercial and not even an invite from their employer. I also have the ability to see he results of others hard work and contributions to society that allow me to know I can write, share my research and data, results, my lessons, my concerns, my love all like the sentiments of writing a wish list during the holidays and sending it to who wants to know in all honesty. I realize some of the problem areas in my life is when I buy my mother gifts in response to the gifts "Santa" purchased. It is also me knowing when not to "ruin" the surprise of knowing that people in my life have experienced my accomplishments the way I experience a decorated Christmas tree and gifts. 


It is also knowing that people can't often see quiet and shy coming from me or how nervous I get to share my silly jokes that are actually very appropriate if you see the entire context and create the appropriate relationship. There is a larger framework that in certain spaces should be seen. It is also hoping people actually see what self-control is and being self satisfied in the moments I get to take my next big chance and let other people show who or what would have not survived. It is also knowing the guy who started Christmas, as in creating, inventing and passing things out looked crazy to some people. It is loving and showing love your way no matter what other people say. I am like the person who prevents asthma or passes out inhalers and people decline because it looks weird. Then they go to the doctor to realize they have all the symptoms I pointed out and they will be paying a lot for the service. It is me not being saddened by the person who gives up their life compliments and access because they are clogged with residue from the school day. It is normal for a teacher to hand you a grade but someone cannot give you critical life feedback. It is also seeing being constantly celebrate what has given them a fail and not getting better or receiving where they have succeeded. It is taking the job from an employer and not seeing the importance of taking the purse given to you and that no one will argue about spa's and nails. I have friends and family members who are often happy to hear gossip and complaints about me that say I did not go somewhere and surrender, especially when my mom buys me lip gloss. I did not sit in oppression that others may have ended up strapped into and prayed their entire lives I would survive the impact of. It is knowing that women and girls who have ever aimed to shame or bad mouth me would walk side by side with me if they could realize the jungle like state we are in. The one we ran across the territory essentially to be in. Years would be the proper term, if people didn't know the word years they would see people and smile, dance or scream sister if they have been properly taught words in a particular context. Some have been jailed or jailed themselves, their minds, their bodies and put themselves in captivity and not taken their rightful place. There is something pleasant about knowing what it means to commune. I struggle to respond to people who have never been to a playground and make fun of people's bumps and bruises. It is the day I realize I am getting attacked for responding to someone's comment about my New York & Company white wash jeans. It is professional to know the danger of interrupting people who are reaping from other people's lack and blocking me from making corrections when I have earned that space. I also should learn why I would have to be removed from people who only know the word blood and argue when you say period or mensuration. These same people live in an environment where there is only rape and do not understand sexual intercourse. They will identify my interactions with improper words and not notice the location of how the one they want to use is incorrect. Anyone who increased their reading level through the development of my blog can pick their face up off the ground now. I also have to hide when I will not feel sad for knowing the difference and be mean for how people went to treat me. People who wouldn't even have services or support if assaulted should not be made fun of because of what they have went to say about me and others like me.The will also think assignments are hard labor. The tasks of my life are as hard as the person who writes about the murder of Jesus and sings songs about it. Those people often want to apologize when there is no need. I'm going to move forward in my life understanding the slogan from Twix, "two for me and none for you". I go back and forth like a person who can correct the assignments of m peers. You just don't get it is what I can see, not the other way around. You creep up every year with a fail and do not see the correct in front of you. I have a goal of wanting to write a textbook. Whatever happens along that journey, I'm all about it. There are people who want to get into an interaction with me to say they did not know me like that and keep noticing something that they are responding to. They are going to look like a stranger who is coming to me to respond to the behavior I am doing always that is saying "If you are here to address me about something between me and another person , I wasn't talking to you and I do not know you either". You can't see the behavior because it is correct. This information is old, like when I read about the civil war in elementary school. There are people starting trouble because they are going to say "meet me after three or on the playground". Then they report the person who in the initial interaction is responding NOW. Watching one episode of something can cause people to hold or start fights and aim to have a public discussion when they get older about it. They fail to see these discussions are in the moment and after years or relationship development. I think it is important for people to see who is sad when they see me hand out free ice cream. I would love all people to enjoy the experience but if you did something to remove yourself what sadness would I feel other than if the people grabbing all the ice cream beat you up. If you realize the people many most likely start a fight with did not miss the school lesson on knights and such things. As in when one person can ride out and conquer many on their own. In this generation asking certain questions is like asking why someone keeps letting you get lunch. 

It is me growing up that I have heard about how Condoleezza Rice dismisses black people and living seeing her in the Soviet Union and having read her story. There is also something worth noting about people who say they never see someone at the "waterhole" because they do not realize they have a shower in their home. I have also seen Tony Rock perform comedy and know not to laugh to hard because of my child like allegiance to Chris Rock when I should have never seen his comedy in the first place. And knowing of this family relation and secretly aiming to see if I can pull my sarcasm through in my writing so that I can appear as funny as something that could be Kevin Hart's little sister or brother since only boys get haircuts and go natural. Everyone who stopped reading the rest of the Jesus story because people shouldn't use names can go about they business while I perfect in the proper space adoration and acknowledgement. It is also living like I can tell when people have cut themselves off from living through the entire outcome or end of a situation. And if no one else but the writers of Batman think that "riddle me this" is funny, so be it. I laugh when people let people keep going and causing a problem with my proper usage of a space only to find out that this will be used for why girls and people of "color" should not have access and the call for affirmative action for specified ones. This is also knowing that means no, the people who chose this cannot go on to get a vehicle or money for fancy things. This to me is the issue of a world with words and lack of guidance or proper usage. I would not be shocked if a family member of mine knocked me down for not having a Keratin product that should be in my possession after she has showed and taught me things without having to speak. I would understand why and have no qualms about my family showing me how hard it is to raise and teach when you have words and now when one should could be in danger or communicate something unknowingly. There are people who make umbrella statements in the wrong context. The program I do with women and girls has a ten person maximum that can be altered. However, many people are waiting for something to decline or turn down that they are never going to be invited to and it becomes very clear why when they get into the space. I had to learn that there are people acting things out and I have to stop creating open space for people to share my success when they openly acknowledge that they, according to their thought process have not contributed. If I can see you are not smart, to me struggling to comprehend in the conversation is enough to share a good job and go home and put in effort then combine. I have learned I cannot see to close the space tightly because I cannot see that someone who has crossed me is in the space only to constantly see that I will not notice because their statement is untrue in my regards. I have learned that I can develop mental health problems because of what people do in the space, suspiciously. There are people I will never know are joking with me or bothering me because the behavior of not having ever starved looks weird. Or that knowing climate change is real, when it sounds silly to them even when they can see the four seasons and respond to them accordingly means there is a problem with vocabulary and what it means. There are some answers people will just have to get on their own. In a mediated culture I know some people really develop the wrong understanding and put themselves in jeopardy. There are people and the ones who are great with never having been clapped for teach me that some men and women also haven't learned to buy their own soap and the person they actually are is far worse off than the people they aim to discuss or dispose of or speak about picking cans out of trash cans in public. The funny thing is that if they do not know about these lawful practices and initiatives they are more left out of society than they could imagine. They watch people like me on television and then when they see me have something to address for no apparent reason. They also cannot see when they speak they spread diseases. 

People often want me to see something and I often want them to see something back as well. People comment about where or how I learn and get mad when their comments and gossip prove that I am ready to enter the contest for the million dollar win. People who cannot see the million dollar contest and do not realized how unprepared they would be. It is the day their parent, guardian or mentor is involved and it shows in public they did not learn to buy their own hygiene products and why. The winning spot is where you would have to have your own toilet tissue and body wash and what that translates into. Can you notice when one would want to back me into a corner and hair braids never show up because I can count and see that their is no purpose in the moment for them. The hardest part of my life's journey is where I have to use a poncho while others can run out in the rain with a plastic bag to keep from getting wet. I also know blocking our real emotions can be disabling. Love people like you do, even if they criminalize you. There are people making fun of people and not realizing who or what they are having a very positive relationship with and making a big funny joke with. It actually i funny when someone who does community work aims to have youth bully someone all the way to when they get into the persons's space and realize they would beg for them to work with them in addition to the fact that you are supposed to be learning alongside the anti-bullying campaign but cannot see who you are failing in front of. I fail tactfully in front of who should be doing the fix. If you didn't have to fight your way to a resource or space you would probably at first glance purchase a pink bow purse. You are unable to identify with the experience and want to address someone because of the attempt at fighting against them and what it does to them where you think your opinion matters. Can I be honest that television is making people act as if audience members on Comic View are Richard Pryor. People have also developed language and critique from watching Tyra on top model. Most of my mishaps and life issues come from people having something to say where and when they should not. 


Here's to writing my life, speaking my truth and telling a story from the center. 

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