How I See It, There Are People Kissing All The Time!
November 7, 2019
Can I mention that I learned about heaven and hell at a young age and swore everyone in the world knew about whatever it is. I once asked a question of someone who shared that they were participating in the LGBTQ community about whether or not this meant they were hell bound. It was a serious question and it was guided by scripture that I had learned in the way organize religious groups with the proper installments would teach about these things overall. I am a person who focuses on the core and heart of a person. I can still conceptualize social identity and what this means in regards to societal participation in certain structures. On my journey to understand religious and social constructions around gender and sexuality I fell in love with two films Pariah and Prayers for Bobby. I use them in my teaching and always focus on learning and developing along my own personal journey. I often hear people suggesting that I would be hurt by things people have had to say or aimed to put me through due to my societal participation and affiliation, (often attacking me for things that are the equivalent of being able to read after being place in a pre-school and elementary schools which would want me to leave with the highest level of ability, as I did). If they had any awareness of what people who learn and develop do, especially someone who would grow to use resources such as Prayers for Bobby to teach to the humanity of people, they would know I would be more mad than hurt. More importantly my awareness would make me comprehend and completely move on from whatever situation someone has sought to put me through. Some things in life are like smoking weed and knowing you would never actually buy a bag for yourself or make that apart of your day to day lifestyle. There are also people who know and understand how certain forms of sexual identity come from famine or lack of resources. Writing and the spread of communication as we know today did not exist prehistorically. There are people who do not realize that they are considered becoming diseased at the first sign of acne. This is not somewhere written in stone, it is most likely somewhere written in a surgical procedure that deals with whatever formed after ten years of the first sign or symptom of something larger. Allow me to again mention my notice of what cannibalism is and how some people where preparing to eat other people and not for love, sexual intimacy or reproduction. I can comprehend this the way I can hear the word "diploma" and know that means xyz years of education. Which means a numerical amount of seconds and hours, pay checks, pay stubs, applications, deadlines, textbooks, purchases, training, grading and all the other things that go into formalizing learning experiences. Similarly I can hear the word planner and know that means a year to eighteen months for the most part. And, no, no one needs a haircut. It is amazing to see the attacks people will give when you buy according to participation. I buy my son things the same way I buy him socks for Kidz Klub. This means one sneaker is the obvious, even if he has more. However, I purchase so I do not complain about when he needs a new pair because his feet grew or about the cost of a school field trip. I have to pay attention to the ways people will try to throw me off or act as if my money isn't for investing in my career, especially when they are doing work that only requires their uniform and fail to go to the laundry mat or they wouldn't make comments about me buying lotion. I am also learning to not be annoyed by illiterate excitement. I only show that behavior privately. I have been exposed to words since about the age of three. Some normal dialogue looks like outburst to me and I know to regulate my responses. Any illiterate thing would be seen privately. And I would do it because I have money to buy Lysol. I need people to wear gold chains that say "keep out". Can I also mention how annoying it is to know that I live in a life where people have to point things out because there is no mirror or knowledge in the area where you can develop a bad habit quickly. Simple ones like not knowing to clean a wound before putting on a bandaid and if you have over $8.00 and hour in your pay check that most likely means buy peroxide and/or neosporin also. I am practicing frugality and saving for my next trip to the hair salon. Yes, getting my hair braided is something I CAN DO. Just like xyz people can read. I have learned not to pick up a habit of spending like I owe Rent-A-Center money or that I am pretending I got robbed by a drug dealer. There are people who want me to be happy and SAD about my life because they have seen a movie. Wherever they would want tears there would be a notebook and a pen or a dollar and the knowledge of where some store I want to go to is or some person I want to visit. I would probably cry if I didn't know how to get somewhere. I can imagine there are people who will always wish they had went to vote or people will think they cannot read or something. I'll save my insults for people who avoid childbirth for a day when I can see someone who existed without hospitals and jails. Some things people really just do not know, like how you can fall in love in one second and never see the person or see them always or sometimes. There are people who know the word love after they are in it, before it or during it. You can see and feel love developing like you can see and feel cancer developing when you have learned what it is. There is nothing funnier than having an experience that you can understand as love and also be a person who has seen enough television and movies that you kind of know what the other person is doing when you are not around and then you laugh realizing what it looks like to other people even if you just walk by each other.